A Letter to Our Daughter

It’s a bit surreal that today is the last of your days at Harrington Park School. This journey of the past 9 years has been a wonderful, challenging experience that has shaped you and transformed you. We are truly proud of your dedication to your studies and academic achievements. But even more significant is our pride in your character development. Yes, you have made mistakes along the way. Dad and I have, too. But that’s the point - without mistakes...there is no growth. No learning. No change. And reflection is the most powerful tool in improving yourself. So here goes...

We have grown in our approach to guide you through life’s difficulties. We have forced ourselves to take a step back and let you fumble your way through problems (while always offering guidance when you recognize you need it). As difficult as it was (and still is) to do that, the payoff is worth it. Because you have grown in your ability to address things honestly and directly, and you have apologized and meant it, and changed your behavior accordingly. This is an impressive feat of maturity that some adults have not yet achieved.

We have learned to trust in your judgement and decision making. It’s a scary world out there, and as tempting as it is to “helicopter” and pave the way for you, we know this will not adequately prepare you for real life. You have keenly observed the world and the interactions of people, and we know you have learned to trust your instincts, your inner voice - and that’s the voice that matters most. The rest is just noise.

We have changed our mindset that it’s ok to set some boundaries. We have NOT changed in our belief to ALWAYS be kind...but you can still be kind while maintaining boundaries. Don’t let your kindness be mistaken for weakness. You can be kind AND strong - these are not mutually exclusive...and you have changed in this way. Lean on those aforementioned instincts to create healthy boundaries that will protect you from judgement and negativity, and lean into love and peace.

Back in 1989, when I met my “new” Harrington Park friends freshman year at NVOT, I learned that there was something special about HP. The bond that these girls had was enviable, and their welcoming of me into their clan was the beginning of lifelong friendships. So, in closing, as you embark on your high school journey, I asked my tribe to share their best words of wisdom:

Follow YOUR own path. Think about what you want your future to look like and when you come to a crossroads ask yourself if it will help you get to what you want or hurt you. Then make the choice.

Rejection is just redirection. Keep going.

Check on yourself as much as you check on Instagram.

Remember to have fun along the way. You are only young once!
Sometimes the bravest moments happen when you step out of your comfort zone and surprise yourself.
You will be “too much” for some people. Too loud, too soft. Too this, too that. But you’ll always be perfect for the people who love you. Do not make yourself smaller for anyone.

We love you, sweet girl, and we can’t wait for the rest of your journey! xoxo

Congratulations to all the HP Spartans and the Class of 2019! May you forever continue to “Lead the Way”!